[UNTITLED]

(This post cannot be described by any amount of words,big or small, or even pictures-the pain in the eyes of the people of Mumbai will tell you better that I’m trying to echo the sentiments of my fellowmen and hence remains untilted as no word(s) will do justice to how we feel.)

A terrorist,one year,an almost dead trial,one lousy ‘system’,some heroes,hundreds of lives,a few thousand shaken beliefs, some controversies, a few leads, millions of rupees, a zillion tears………pretty much where Mumbai stands on 26/11/2009,exactly a year after the horrific terror attack.It would be an understatement to say that it shook the city…I believe the soul of the city was raped.
It took almost 3 entire days to wrap up the operations and rescue the remaining few people they could save from the fangs of death in the hands of the terrorists.
And then it begun:
The funerals,the monetary compensations, the blame-games,the finger pointing,the candle light peace marches,the vast media coverage,the controversies,the ‘spirit of the city’ crap…and in the midst of all this,every Mumbaikar,whether personally hurt or not by this devastation,beagn to pick up the pieces as always and moved on.
And where do we find ourselves a year later?In tears?In fright?Swearing at our politicians?Wearing white to show your solidarity?Going “tsk-tsk” while reading how the so -called ‘bullet-proof’ jacket of one of our policemen who died fighting is lost? Maybe singing about it.Staging a play.Directing a documentary.Or perhaps,blogging about it, like me?
Hey wait. It doesn’t stop here. How could I forget? A year later, people are fighting in the Vidhan Sabha on who should speak what language. Some are showing you the consequences of talking in your so called 'National Language’. A year later, people are looking with suspicion at a person(s) who comes out with evidence about some terrorists. A year later I get a text message on my phone from a security system company which says one of the hotels attacked last year is now protected with their security systems(seriously, are they making a mockery of the whole thing? Where were these people a year back?)A year later, the newspaper headline reads” some people who helped the terrorists have been traced to Italy and’ Could’ be deported by the Indian Government". A year later, the people helping rebuild and secure the hotels that were attacked are sleeping at the Gateway, with no roof over their head(and once this shame has been reported, the immediate rectifying action by the authorities? Another shame.: A tiny rodent-infested accommodation with hardly any facilities to live in)
A year later.....
We talk about it, We see it. We feel it. We read about it. We write about it. We swear at it. We breathe it. We live it.
We accept a hopeless,inaccurate and failed system. We approve of an inefficient security force. We don’t care…”Oh no, we do care. who says we don’t care? Of course we do”. Its just that we don’t show it,right?The anger boiling within, the tears in our eyes, the prayers on our lips, the swear words on our tongue……..its all there…..bottled up. But not vented out. Because as always, be it a 26/11,a 11/7 or anything else, we have been trained to move on. We’ve trained our bodies, our mind and souls to accept the crap and move on.Because we are so used to taking all the screwy s*** in life that takes place in this city.
So I, like a few, put pen to paper and try and vent out my emotions through words. My blood boils. What does it give me?Relief?Satisfaction that I dint keep my mouth shut like a few others?Yeah,all that.But what do I conclude it with?With Hope for the future?A safer life?A more accountable system?
NO.
I’ve learnt,like every other Mumbaikar,to shut my gob,hide my tears, put up a brave face, show some bloody’ spirit’ ,to learn to live in fear from the threat within more than the from the threat outside, and to move on. And learn to be prepared to face all the” bade shaher mein hadse” .

God, save us all. Save our city-Its our home.Iv always considered it to be my home, loved it like my home and thought of the people of this city ,obviously, as family.(Even though they might not think of me that way and kick me out one day) But my love, support and fidelity to this place will never cease and I will always be ready to fight for my city and its people, just like I was ready to, a year ago, along with those bravehearts.
Afterall,Home is where the Heart is.
We don't need no more bloodshed.We don't need any more sympathy.We don't need any candle light vigils.We don't need no more tears.
No person/party/politician is on our side.We stand alone.We suffer alone.
We need nothing short of a miracle to save us.
God,we need you.

(And after reading this, if you still felt indifferent, its alright.
Obviously, its concludes that your not a Mumbaikar.
Heck,your not me.)